It’s a hard thing when someone you care about has something bad happen in their life and they won’t talk about what’s wrong, much less allow you to help them. I have often been through difficult times and I have been the one stubbornly shouldering the burden myself. Now that I see it happen to someone who I was growing close to I feel frustrated that I’m not allowed to be a good friend and help. I know there is incongruity there in my thoughts, where it’s perfectly acceptable for me to shoulder a burden on my own, but that it’s not ok for those I care about to do the same. Perhaps the difference is that when I shoulder the burden myself I do not shut out those I care for completely, even though I do retreat and deal with things myself.
It is especially hard to see someone in pain during the Christmas season and be unable to help them in any way. I guess I’m sort of naive in this, but I feel everyone should be happy for Christmas. I wish it were possible.
How do you help a friend who refuses your help, who refuses to even talk about what’s wrong?